I love this! when guests don't want to pay the bill I typically follow with "Well, I make 2.13 an hour, so, I'm not paying for it either" (guilt) or I try and get funny and say "I have 8 wives and 3 kids, I can't pay this!" When they act surprised I tell them I was a horny adolescent Mormon.
For the ticket I tell them "you can't win the door prize without a ticket" then I just look at them and wait they always ask what's the door prize? "pay the ticket get out the door" What can I say I've been waitressing 23 yrs There's not much I haven't heard and even less that I don't have a smart ass response to.
I've never heard the 'tow truck' one, we always get the 'Don't you have a wheelbarrel to wheel me out in?' Or 'Damn, why do you guys have so many stairs, you should get an elevator.' Or 'I ate so much I feel like I'm going to explode' to which I say 'Oh please don't, we hate it when that happens! It's very messy!'
That's almost as bad as "can I get you anything else?"
ReplyDeleteThey say no, and when I drop the check: "We said we didn't want anything else!"
I like to tell them "no tow truck but I have a taser works good and more fun for me"
ReplyDeleteHaha I love that!
ReplyDeleteI love this! when guests don't want to pay the bill I typically follow with "Well, I make 2.13 an hour, so, I'm not paying for it either" (guilt) or I try and get funny and say "I have 8 wives and 3 kids, I can't pay this!" When they act surprised I tell them I was a horny adolescent Mormon.
ReplyDeleteLoved the CARS reference!
And the obviously have no self control. And probably high blood pressure.
ReplyDeleteFor the ticket I tell them "you can't win the door prize without a ticket" then I just look at them and wait they always ask what's the door prize? "pay the ticket get out the door" What can I say I've been waitressing 23 yrs There's not much I haven't heard and even less that I don't have a smart ass response to.
ReplyDeleteI've never heard the 'tow truck' one, we always get the 'Don't you have a wheelbarrel to wheel me out in?' Or 'Damn, why do you guys have so many stairs, you should get an elevator.' Or 'I ate so much I feel like I'm going to explode' to which I say 'Oh please don't, we hate it when that happens! It's very messy!'
ReplyDeleteI guess we could write a whole blog of all the "funny" things our guests say! ....oh wait! We do :)
ReplyDelete