Rose doesn't want me to convert.

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Work has really been getting at me this week...so it's about time I vent!

But first, a little story about everyone's favorite regular!

One of our lunch servers got a big boy job, and is moving into another servant serving position: Production Assistant. Rose, who has always thought he looked like a "nice, Jewish boy" (he's actually Catholic) was pretty sad to hear it was his last day...

"Who am I gunna bother now?"
The rest of us will still be here for you, Rose!
"I don't wanna bother you. I wanna bother him!"
Rose, you know he's been trying to get me to convert to Catholicism for him??
"WHAT?!? NO! YOU'RE JEWISH!"

Guess she won't miss him THAT much :)

Don't get fussy with me, Rose!

On a lunch shift, we usually have 2 servers on the floor right away at 11am when we open. The other few must take their break from 11:30-12 so they can't take tables when they first arrive at the restaurant.

This particular day, Rose came in right away at 11...but the section where HER table is (Table 2, btw) didn't have a server yet. The dumb hostess started to tell Rose she couldn't sit at that table because there is no server to take care of her...

Uh oh...

Rose LOST it. She screamed at the hostess and told her she would sit wherever she wants because SHE is the boss.

I came out just as all of this happened, and told the hostess not to worry....we would take care of Rose no matter whose section she sat in. The only bad part is, I had to deal with the aftermath:

"Can you believe that girl tried to tell me I can't sit at my table? Who does she think she is?"

Rose, it's ok. She didn't know. She doesn't normally work lunch.

"Whattaya mean she didn't know? How could she not know who I am?"

Oy.

Then, she started to get snippy with me, saying I must be "too busy" to take care of her. But since I feel comfortable putting her in her place, I had none of her sass.
Don't get fussy with me, Rose! I'm not the one you're mad at!


Needless to say, Rose told EVERYONE that walked past her about what happened.

Rose is 82.

Oh yes. 

February 11th was Rose's birthday, and you can BET she was at Bloggiano's.
(I can't believe I hadn't written about this yet!)

She had very specific requests demands:

-Balloons and flowers at her table for her and her friend 

-Her "special" minestrone soup ready when she got there

-To not pay for her coffee

Laila is a saint, because she actually paid out of her own pocket to make it extra special for her. When Rose arrived, she was overwhelmed with the amount of visitors and "Happy Birthday's" she received from the employees.

She kept saying how much we must really like her, and how she felt so special. See, sometimes Rose can be a little sweetheart. Even our General Manager went over to talk to Rose, and when she left the table she came up to me saying...
"I didn't realize Rose knows you as the 'little Jew girl'" 

Hey, whatever works! 

At the end of the meal, I brought Rose a specially made fruit plate with candles and EVERYONE sang! Homer got in real close and sang right into Rose's ear. That's probably the closest proximity she's ever been to a black man. I'm just saying, she was smiling ear to ear.

This little Jew girl got the biggest tip Rose has EVER given to a Bloggiano's employee: $5
...That may or may not have been because her entire meal was comped.

Rose wants dough.

Well, it's a new year...

But for Rose, it's business as usual. She still...

1) refuses to pay for her soup (which they keep mostly for her because it's not on the menu anymore)
2) refuses to pay for coffee
3) leaves $1 or $2 in tip, depending on whether or not she likes her server

The other day she told me a story about how she asked our GM for a donation to the Jewish Community Center she's involved with...
"She looked at me and said, 'Again?' That's not very nice. You know The Pizza Factory donated $100. But, anyway, I know she's got a lot on her plate."

Oh, Rose.

When I asked our GM about it, she told me she already donated to Rose and is even hosting an event for her at the restaurant! No wonder, "Again?" was her response.

I'm afraid it's too late for dear, old Rose. She's a living stereotype. 
But as long as I continue to chat with her about Israel, she's on Team Lindsay, so we're good!

Rose has a new jacket...and is pretty racist.

Everyone's favorite Bloggiano's guest is at it again...

Apparently she did well at Hanukkah because her children bought her the jean jacket she was wearing, which she claimed makes her look, "young" and "hip."

It goes great with your cane, Rose.

Our conversation took a turn for the worse when she told me she'd been speaking to the new girl in front selling Bloggiano's Gift Cards.
"You know the girl in the front? The blonde one?"

Yes, Rose.

"You know she's from Germany?"

Uh-oh...

"She looks like a typical Nazi. Blonde. Blue eyes. Her Grandfather was probably a sergeant."

Wow, Rose. Wow..

Homer Phones Home

Remember Homer from my training days?

I've since figured out that he
Never
Stops
Talking.

All of the servers have pretty much resorted to ignoring him when he speaks (most of the time he's talking to himself anyway) and everyone knows you never ask him a question....unless you want to spend the next 10 minutes listening to him talk about it. This time, it was a lecture about extra-terrestrials and how the world would be better without humans. And, I swear the other day I caught him talking to our computers, telling them the order he'd like to put in. It's not voice-activated, Homer!

While folding napkins before my break, he got to talking about being holistic for the last 25 years. The man carries around a huge container or Purell and apparently never takes medicine. He told me he never gets sick because he mentally accepts the illness, and then sends it out to the world.

Please don't send your crazy my way! Thanks!


OH! I almost forgot that when another girl made a joke he liked, he commented, "Girl, I'm gonna have to put you on my 'to do' list." Ewwwwwwww

Rose thinks I'm funny.

You remember Rose, right?

I chatted with her for awhile about wanting to open a restaurant one day. Ideally it would be an all-day breakfast spot serving the kinds of glorious foods I ate in Israel. The Israeli breakfast is far supreme to the Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity, lemme tell ya!

(Photo by Leetal Elmaleh)

I'm not sure what exactly I was saying, but apparently she found me entertaining:

"You're really funny. And you're Jewish. You know what you should do?"

What, Rose?

"Marry a rich man, and use his money to open your restaurant."

I'll work on that. Thanks.

Rose

Regulars.

Every restaurant has them.

Rose is an 81 year old Jewish woman who comes in to eat minestrone soup at Bloggiano's about three times a week. I know she's 81 because she pulled me over on my first day of training to say, "You're new" on my first day of training and told me her life story.

I've been informed by some of the other employees on how to deal with Rose.

1) Never joke with her when she doesn't know your name, no matter how many times she's met you. Her response: "I'm 81. I'm not supposed to remember. You're supposed to remember." (I hope you're doing a Jewish New Yorker voice in your head, because that's how she sounds.)

2) Never respond with, "We don't serve minestrone soup anymore" when she orders it. We keep some frozen for the people like her who still come in to get it after it was removed from the menu.

3) Never walk by her table without smiling, or stand around doing nothing where she can see you. She'll claim she's the boss and send you home.

4) If she asks you to sit with her, DO IT. But if you get stuck there, just pull another server into the conversation and sneak away.

In my first experience with Rose, she told me how old her children were and then said she has a granddaughter who has, "a better job than any of you!" Thanks Lady.
While some servers try to avoid her all together, I took another route. I told her I am Jewish and that I lived in Israel last year. Now she loves me.

I choose to be on her good side, just in case.